Merry Christmas to All and to All Good Last-Minute Shopping!

Charlie, our newest and most appealing family member.

Charlie cuddles with his mom, Lauren.

Kate posing atop a cat that Megan invented and who is now is Kate's namesake.

Lauren took a really good picture of Megan in her element:  chalk and black-top surface.

Lauren visited Maryland to help Meg pack and keep everyone company.  Every time she packed a box--Megan hugged her.

Anton and Jon together.

It has been such a long time since I posted photos of family.  Jon and Kate are growing so tall.  Kate's personality has taken root and she is a definite, calming influence as she watches Jon jump up and down while he is thinking--and lights up with adoring eyes when Jon takes her hand to pull her across the street--followed by Megan dashing after them.  

The story is that Megan has always insisted that Jon hold hands while crossing the street.  Jon's intellectual prowess posited to him the conclusion that ANY hand could be held while crossing the street.  Kate is now walking quite quickly and follows Jon whenever and where ever she can.  Jon took advantage of that fact and, inspired by the appearance of a street in front of him, grabbed Kate's hand.  Her face lit up with joy and the two of them took off.  This had never happened to Megan--and Lauren described the flash of panic on Meg's face as she realized what was happening and leapt to intervene.  Apparently Jon was quite put out by the fact that his mother had quashed this very appealing option that allowed him the freedom to decide when and where he could cross the street--while also following his mom's "hold-hands-while-we-cross-the-street" rule.  

The situation reminds me of Megan's first semester of college.  I was caring for her two sugar gliders, allowing them to roam the room their cage was in while I cleaned.  I left for a moment to prepare their supper and when I returned, I could not find one of them.  Mariel was nowhere to be seen.  I listened--sometimes they gave themselves away by rustling as they scrambled over and around the objects in the room.  Burrito was in her place--ready for vegetables (hate the beans, hate the carrot--LOVE the peas) and fingers-full of mashed potatoes--she began to scold me (imagine a broken pencil sharpener . . . a LOUD, SHRILL broken pencil sharpener) when I didn't deliver supper immediately.  I put the dinner plate down where Burrito couldn't reach it and began to search for Mariel.  I began slowly to look in all her favorite places.  No sugar glider.  I then began to quickly pick up objects on the floor--the room was not all that big.  No sugar glider.  Then I began to move furniture to see if she was stuck behind something.  No sugar glider . . . until I accidentally pushed a box of fabric scraps sitting in the middle of the room.  Suddenly I was stopped by the LOUD, SHRILL broken pencil sharpener that was Mariel.  She had found her way onto the top of the box, down through the folded top flaps, and into a large piece of printed flannel.  I opened the box and found her--glaring at me and daring me to move her from her new-found living space.  

Now, this might be OK for some pets.  Certainly the cats we've had have slept atop towels and dirty laundry . . . OK, and clean laundry.  When I was sewing and they found a loose wad of material, they were quick to claim it as their own--purring loudly and leaving bits of fur behind when they ambled off to get something to eat.  Sugar gliders, however, are very small animals that tend to mark their territory by peeing on it and their little poops (they do not potty train--even for owners they adore like their Megan) are STICKY.  So, leaving Mariel to keep her prize was not an option. I carefully lifted her--surrounded by her flannel bed--and deposited her softly into a corner of her (HUGE) cage.  Mariel immediately left the bed and refused to be comforted.  Not even a finger-full of mashed potato could calm her down.  Burrito, however, was more than willing to gobble down both hers and Mariel's portions . . . which, I am sure, did nothing to mitigate the irritation that Mariel felt towards me at that point.  

Back to Meg and her toddler Kate and pre-school Jon.  Jon expressed himself in a mild mirror of Mariel when I removed her from the box.  SHE had found it and it was HERS.  Jon had discovered a way to cover all the bases without needing to wait for Megan to cross the street.  It had not turned out as he hoped--he was disappointed, I hear--though certainly not as vociferous in his complaints as Megan's former, furry charge.  

Happy Thanksgiving From 2 Who Are All Alone at Last

Charlie and Grandma Carolyn

Megan and Lauren and together at Meg's house in Maryland.  

The front of Meg and Anton's current apartment.

Meg and Anton have bought a town home and are preparing to move in in December.  La and Charlie left Sunday morning early--Charlie's first time in an airplane.  Apparently Charlie spent the entire time with his nose hidden in the crook of La's arm.  Of course everyone was charmed by him--but it was all too new and he didn't really look forward to meeting new people.  Meg's children are  having no problem taking their time getting to know him--Jon has even agreed to wait to show Charlie his favorite cars.  I'm proud of La for offering to go and help with the messy stuff.  

That, of course, means that Brent and me are officially empty nesters . . . and Meg and Anton have an exceptionally full nest this Thanksgiving week.

I can hardly wait until La brings back pictures from her time there!!!!!

H. acetosella: Directed Research Study by Carolyn Hendry for Dr. G. Rogers

Please look at my final project about the wild Hibiscus acetosella--my newest baby; born, adopted, and growing with me in Florida.

Here:  http://www.scribd.com/doc/102352385

ORABRUSH by Dr. Bob Wagstaff

ORABRUSH

Me at our CVS Drugstore . . . Orabrush modeling.

(Horrible photo of me--great product.)

Robert "Dr. Bob" Wagstaff

Founder & Chairman of the Board
Orabrush, Inc. 

THIS IS MY DAD!!!!!!!
After years of coming to watch my piano recitals and school choir performances and play presentations . . . I am now getting to stand back and brag about my dad and what he and Cindy have accomplished with ORABRUSH!!!!!  You know how there was always a Teacher and Parent's Night when you were in school . . . your parents would come and sit in your desk and (if it was Elementary School) see your drawings on the bulletin board and read the letter that you'd carefully printed out earlier that day  on that gray, learn-to-print paper.  Now is World and Business Leaders Night:

This the link to the company website:
http://orabrush.com

This is a cool YouTube video that went viral:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4oKYeWf3dPA&feature=uploademail

Orabrush ready for action

Dad has always been good at seeing a product (like marigold flowers) and putting them into new applications (Kemin, Inc colour enhancer for eggs and broiler chickens).  He made himself one of the first mock-ups of Orabrush more than 10 years ago.  He took it to the Philippines when he and Cindy were serving as Mission Leader there.  He used it everyday and really loved the way it worked.  He put 10s of thousands (that I can guess at, probably more) of dollars and hours into improving and perfecting and trying to get his Orabrush out to the public.  People all over the world are using it now and he started a new business when he was 75 years old.  

I wonder if it will take me until I'm 75 to become successful in the way that he is--I do everything well, my mom used to chide me, but nothing better than anyone else.  My dad is doing something better than everyone else on this earth.  

He was always the best father he knew how to be--and, now, is a good example for me to try to emulate.  The thing about Orabrush that he is most proud of is the number of people--families--who have a good job and health insurance and are able to be self-sufficient.  His satisfaction comes from seeing the success and happiness of those he has helped.  He and Cindy still stay at Motel 6 when they travel and drive rather than fly when they go to visit family in the midwest.  He lives modestly and has found joy in providing circumstances and things that would otherwise not be available.  He served as President of his housing area's board--buying all of the materials and building a children's play area for the 100s of children that live in the apartments in his community.  He showed me how he put together a climbing wall for young children.  I played on the teeter-totter with my own grown up daughter while he sat nearby and talked with us.  

He has had to overcome obstacles from the time his mother died 2 weeks after he was born through  rough school years and through to his efforts to show his dad that he had succeeded as a breadwinner.  The summer that we drove from our home to Utah for family vacation, we arrived at our grandpa Wagstaff's house in a Lincoln Continental, my mother confided in me that this was the first time that dad had heard his own father tell him that he had finally made something of himself.  

Ask about an old trumpet mounted on the wall of his current home and he will tell you that playing in the school band, he discovered that there were different kinds of trumpet parts--and that he could choose what he would play.   This discovery opened his eyes to the fact that he could choose other things in his life.  Quite a revelation--one that I don't think most people ever find.

I am proud of my dad.  He has spent his whole life working--when he comes to my house for a few days, he asks for a list of things that need fixing around the house.  I call it the "wears Florsheim shoes on the beach" syndrome.  My junior and senior years of high school we lived 30 minutes from Ocean City, Maryland.  We would have lunch on the beach and he would come from work to have lunch with us.  In his suit and tie, he would walk out on the sand to where we were sitting and kind of hunch over, eat a sandwich, then kiss my mom goodbye and go back to work.  He never sat down or took his shoes off.  He focused on supporting our family--mom was able to stay home and take care of us.

He is quiet spoken.  He and mom never screamed at each other or fought about differences--they had them, of course--but he refused to be angry with mom.  The only time that I was told (I don't remember it.) he yelled was when he came home from work and mom would be crying in the bedroom.  "What did you kids do to her?"  I know now that she was most probably suffering from clinical depression as well as a weak heart from rheumatic fever when she was 6, and a blood disease doctors have only  and found a name and a cure for in the last 7 years.  I always knew that dad was in love with mom--he told her and the family that she was his sweetheart and companion . . . as a child, I felt secure in the certainty that he would always love her--and us.

He is married now to Cindy.  Mom died more than 10 years ago after 8 years fighting non-Hodgkins lymphoma.  Cindy's former husband also died of cancer.  There is a lot of sad in both their histories--but dad continues to work, to move forward, to find joy and satisfaction in creating new things and new ways to use them.

I am so proud to have him as my father.  I am excited to see him off on this adventure now.  I will love him always.

To Teach About Family

Lauren, Megan
Nathan

Lauren and Charlie at puppy training class.

Charlie

Kate before she is introduced to sand.

Kate after she is introduced to sand.

Jon is excited or thinking about something--up and down energy.

Still kind of fuzzy--almost got him not moving.  Jon is perpetual energy personified.

                                                       

Jon was quite enthusiastic about the water.  Meg is a good teacher. 

We got floaties for everyone and a special swim suit for Jon with buoyancy inserts built in.  The sun reflected into our eyes so Meg went in and found hats for everyone.

ICE CREAM TREATS!!!
Kate declined to make use of the stick and went both-hands onto the cold stuff.

Nathan, almost smiling.

Megan, smiling.

Nathan shows nephew Jon how Shaun the Sheep makes noise.

Brent and sleepy Kate.

Lauren and Gypsy

Lauren and Kate

Newborn Kate and me

What is it within me that so overpowers my subconscious?  What is it that always pushes my desire to teach?  

I was working with a new rehab (for my hand just operated on last month) tech and we fell to talking about our families, relationship with spouses, what I did in college, his thoughts on why two people stay together as a couple, my unfinished PhD, the change in the name of the hospital where he worked.  He told one of the other physical therapists about his trick to get children to eat vegetables:  put them on the table and declare that they are his . . . they are not to touch them.  Reverse psychology.  I assured him that method would surely come back to bite him.  You can't reverse direct most behaviors--children learn by watching and trying what they see.  He told me that so far . . . so good.

During the rest of our conversation I was compelled to listen and to talk about how to raise children.  Not overtly, but by using stories from my family's recent past, I tried to teach him how to respect and to reinforce desirable behavior.  Especially I came around to Brent's attitude:  problems need to be fixed, not the blame.  If there is a messy room it doesn't matter who created the disarray--we are family and as a family we will all work together to bring order back to our home.  When children were kind and socialized--when we were at the toy store and no one whined or cried for a toy, when we walked past an ice cream store and no one plead for us to go in and get ice cream, when conversations were balanced and everyone included--in these times, I would thank my children and tell them that I wanted to go and do things with them.  Sometimes we'd go and pick out a cookie at the grocery store, or plan to take a picnic to the park the next day.  When there was yelling or loud disagreements while we were in public, I would (as soon as the child had calmed down) tell the child that I was disappointed and didn't want to go places with someone who made me feel uncomfortable.  

In all this, my most overwhelming yearning was to differentiate between punishment and discipline.  Anger and embarrassment and yelling were ineffective in dealing with anyone--especially children.  Brent's desire to have me feel secure and happy kept me sane and our marriage strong.  When Meg, La and Nate saw me doing something that was usually Brent's job, they would ask me why I was doing it. "If I do it now," I would tell them "he won't have to later."  Our marriage has been so satisfying and joyful, I could hope for nothing more than that every other couple could have the same kind of relationship.  

Now something that drives Brent crazy--another link off of the first subject, kind of.  Going off on a tangent.

I've been reading in the Book of Mormon and again I've seen that those who seek adoration and to rule over others, preach that righteous leaders are only out to get power and riches.  Mosiah told his people that he had never required taxes to build palaces or provide him with an extravagant lifestyle.  He had worked with his own hands to provide for his needs.  His only joy had been the obedience of his people so that they could receive the blessings of their Heavenly Father.  He taught them that they were always in debt to the Lord because he gave commandments that, when obeyed, were rewarded with blessings so that they were in debt to the Lord again.  As a righteous leader, his only goal was to teach his people--that they would be happy.  

Laman and Lemuel continually incited their families and friends to rise up and kill their father Lehi and younger brother Nephi because they said that Nephi only wanted to get power over Laman and Lemuel and usurp their rightful place as the leaders of the family.  Yet, when confronted by an angel and they fall to their knees to worship Nephi, he does not accept their adoration.  Nephi "frankly forgives" them and urges them to worship their Heavenly Father.  Nephi has the same attitude that Brent does--when there are challenges or problems, being able to successfully solve the situation is the priority.  It does not matter who gets credit for the success--because ultimately Heavenly Father's influence and authority are what make it possible for men to move mountains--in accordance with their faith in God and their faithfulness in obeying God's law.

Back to the first subject:

I wanted to tell this man, somehow, that leading his children, rather than fooling them, would be the only way that they would be able to grow up and become as kind, as intelligent, as thoughtful, and as creative as my Megan, my Lauren, and my Nathan.  I wanted for him the incredible blessings--the wonderful life--that I have found.  

As I re-read what I've just written, I like that I want to be like Mosiah and Nephi . . . to be like my husband, and like each of my children. 

Seven Wild Days in July

Kate, Megan, Me, Nathan, Lauren holding Charlie,

and Brent holding Jon

Oh, the more we get together, together, together . . . The more I realize that we don't often get together. But everyone was here this last week.  There are sticky handprints all over the walls and chairs and tables.  There are still flecks of applesauce on my car's back seat between where the children's car seats have been buckled in all week.  I have a sliding glass door adorned with handprints and with generous "kisses" on the surface.  Tonight the house is quiet--not because everyone is asleep, but because La is out in the apartment, Nathan is doing the dishes, Brent is asleep . . . and Meg, Kate and Jon are back with Anton in Maryland.

Enough with the feeling sorry for myself and the days that have just flown past . . . pictures!

Megan Christina Hendry Rytting and Jonathan Anson Rytting

Mother, Wife, Artist, Daughter, Sister and Son, Brother

Lauren Nichole Hendry and Kathrine Anne Rytting

Aunt, Artist, Dog Trainer and Niece, Daughter, Sister

Jonathan Anson Rytting

Nephew, Son, Brother expert car enthusiast

Kate Discovers the Gypsy

She was generally good at sticking to the "soft, soft", but also tried a "poke, poke" or two.

Katherine Takes on the Trucks

As Jon's sister, she gets precious time at home touching or chewing on cars or trucks--

which have historically all belonged to Jon.  She has watched him carefully, though,

and knows exactly how they are suppose to work.

More photos tomorrow.  I still have another camera to download.  Swimming!  Movies!  I hope!

Kate Looking Cute, Nathan Looking Tall, Cranes Eating Breakfast

 Kate looking cute in her little girl outfit.  Meg was always such a tomboy, it surprised me (and her, she told me) that Meg likes to dress Kate in GIRL clothes:  pink, bows, ruffles.  Jon's clothes were always pretty neutral--a car on the front of the shirt and he was ready to go.  

Nathan and me two Sundays ago.  Brent took the photo for me--but after a long "Day of Rest," he was ready to rest.  Nathan and I have become good friends.  It is wonderful that he feels comfortable enough with me to tell me stuff about his problems, his worries, and the Legos that fill a great amount of space in his bedroom.  He is a Sophomore and will graduate with his AS (Associates in Science) this  spring.  Then he is off to BYU.  

Nathan is really good at seeing cool bugs, birds, frogs, toads, reptiles all around our home in Florida.  This was a moth during its last moment of life.  Because it was on a porch screen at night, I had a hard time getting a good focus.  Nathan went outside and !Voila!  The moth is actually dark, forest green and gold with bright stripes on the front of its face.  Amazing.  

These are one of the sand hill crane pairs that rotates around the neighborhood in their search for food.  A few years ago, one of the males was so laid back that I could sit in front of him as he ate and stroke the red crown that covers part of his head.  It is soft, bumpy skin--cool and firm.  None of the other birds that have returned or arrived have ever had this crane's calm demeanor.  I love that these huge birds will follow me around and call for me if there is no food out.  It's the kind of pet that Brent really likes:  no vet bills, no potty boxes to clean out, no molting feathers floating around inside the house.  Also, they don't cost anything.  Big bonus in Brent's eyes.